a snail's pace

so i'm progressing rather slowly with my weight loss. i hate it this slow, but it needs to be done. i want to make sure i keep my daughter out of this, healthy and happy. and i definitely do not want to alert my husband.

these past two weeks have been horrendous. i have been having an extremely hard time. i'm so hungry all the time and it has been frustrating for me. when younger, i never had this difficulty. being active in ED was much simpler living at home with my mother. it was so much easier to hide from her. albeit, she's anorexic and has eating issues herself. but still. living with a man and attempting to restrict or purge has been almost impossible. especially when he knows i'm hungry. or when he attempts to feed me. thank god he's working two jobs right now, i don't know if i could even do this. however, the problem is when he gets home. he wants to eat. and eat. and eat. seeing him constantly munching on things really triggers me. it's driving me absolutely mad.

another thing that sucks majorly while i'm trying to lose weight, is that there are so many different kinds of trigger foods in the house. and i can't get rid of them. it's crazy. my daughter needs to eat so much and have all her snacks. we have all kinds of crackers and cereal and breads and fruits and SNACKS! when i used to live by myself, i made sure never to keep things like that in the house. it helped a lot. but because she needs these things, i have to have them here and they can't be sugar free or fat free. plus, my husband is constantly buying two liters of coca-cola and pepsi. ARG!

anyway, i've lost 10 lbs since i started this quest. i'm hoping to drop another 10 in less than a month. we'll see how it goes.

age - 28
height - 5'4
weight - 130 LBS
BMI - 22.31